


Not all Sunshine

by AChapterCanBeABook



Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians & Related Fandoms - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, But its mostly about that, Fluff, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Just mentions if self harm, M/M, They just talk about the past, trigger warning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-08
Updated: 2015-11-08
Packaged: 2018-04-30 14:28:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,871
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5167259
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AChapterCanBeABook/pseuds/AChapterCanBeABook
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Winter means longer nights and less sun, which is problematic for a child of Apollo who literally thrives from the sun. Nico never realized how much of a problem this once was for his boyfriend, Will Solace. He discovers some hard truths after an annual check up at Camp Half-Blood, but it only makes the two demi-gods closer.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not all Sunshine

**Author's Note:**

> A quick drabble i wrote while listening to Christmas music and discussing the effects of Winter of mental health. I connect with the character Will so i decided to give him my love of Christmas. I also thought it would be a good way to show that people who are outwardly happy such as I am, can be struggling so much underneath. No matter how happy we are on the outside. This is just another warning that there are mentions of self harm. The ine shot is basically about Will's struggle with it from a not so perfect past.
> 
> It also isnt written the best because i was trying to write as fast as i could while the idea was fresh in my mind.

Yearly checkups and flu shots started at Camp Half-Blood right as November rolled around. There weren’t many campers left and the possibility of them getting the flu was small, but it was a good custom to have. Nico wasn’t as excited and he was wrangled into assisting the Apollo cabin since there was only a few of them who were year rounders. He noticed that everything flowed a lot more smoothly than during the summer checkups. A lot more kids and a lot more persisting, especially when it came down to the more personal questions.

Will spat out the questions like a real professional. In fact his entire demeanor changed when he stepped foot into the infirmary. He read from the questionnaire and marked everything as they answered, and didn't bat an eye if they blushed and easily persuaded them to answer the questions even if they didn't want to. The question that seemed to pull only Nico’s attention though was: “Have you self harmed, thought about self harm, or had suicidal thoughts in the past year?”

It was an innocent question that some kids got away easily with a no or a yes. Some on the other hand Will would smile at softly and ask them to show their wrists, thighs, and calves. Once Will got his clear answer he would send each of them off with a smile, regardless if they had fresh scars or fading scars. It was then time for Will’s examination which one of the remaining Apollo girl’s did. Nico couldn’t help his curiosity when it came to the questions.

“Have you had sexual intercourse in the past year?”

“No.”

“Do you smoke?”

“No.”

“Have you self harmed, thought about self harm, or had suicidal thoughts in the past year?”

“3 years clean,” Will answered. Nico couldn’t help but look at the boy from where he was filling an ice pack, in surprise. The girl smiled softly and marked it down. She hesitated before following Will’s example and asked to see his wrists, thighs, and calves. He put out his wrists and very faintly you could see pale scars against his tanned skin. The girl smiled.

“They look a lot better,” she commented. Will smiled brightly at her and stood. He patted the girl on the head.

“You are in charge now Jean. I have some important duties to attend to.” 

The blonde girl nodded and started to attend to a camper with a twisted ankle. When all the campers were taken care of Nico couldn’t tame his curiosity and he walked over to Jean who sat on a swivel stool and looked over some paper work.

“Not all sunshine and rainbows in Apollo cabin?” Nico started.

Jean raised an eyebrow and then frowned. She stacked the papers into a file and folded it closed.

“Not always. I'm assuming you are talking about Will?” She was very astute. Although she was only a year younger than Nico so it was not much of a surprise. Nico nodded. “I don’t know too much, but Apollo kids are weak around this time of year. There isn't as much sun, it's cold, nights are long. We lose some of our power. I read in a book about how humans naturally become more depressed in the Winter because of the same reasons. So take that and double it for some of us. Myself, personally, I love the winter, so I don’t have that problem. And you know if it wasn't for the yearly exams I don't think any of us would have know that Will faced those problems either.”

Nico sat on the bed across from her. “What do you mean?”

“Im sure you can tell by now, but most Apollo kids kind of glow when they have strong emotions. Most of you guys can't tell which emotions we are feeling, but we can all tell the differences in the glows and can decipher what emotion the other is feeling. I am sure you have also noticed that Will glows the most out of all of us sometimes because is very in tune with his emotions. Well, Will almost constantly glows with happiness. If he wasn't so honest we would have never known that he needed us more than we knew. I came to camp near the end of it though. So i don’t know the full extent of it. I just know that he is the happiest and strongest of all of us.” Jean smiled. It was sad and warm. Her blue eyes shimmered with pride. She was proud to be the sister of someone she thought so fondly of.

Nico thanked her and exited the infirmary. He didn't mean to be so snoopy, but he wanted to find Will. Even if they didn't get around to talking about Will’s past, he wanted to be by the boy’s side. He found will with a few of the other campers and creatures helping set up all the Christmas decorations. Will directed them with the widest grin. He was bundled in a sweater and scarf but he glowed like the sun. Mr. D had let the snow start to fall and despite all Will’s efforts he couldn't stop him, so he faced the chill with plenty of warm clothing.

“Always prepared for the holidays Sunshine?” Nico teased. As long as Nico had known Will, the boy had been excited for Christmas. With his new knowledge he frowned a bit as he approached the son of Apollo. He wondered how Will could have so much love for a holiday in the middle of the Winter.

“Of course,” Will said with the brightest smile. He grabbed Nico’s hand, it was warm from the warmers in his gloves. Nico’s were cold as usual. Nico smiled up at him then frowned again. Will raised an eyebrow similarly to how his sister had. “Something wrong?”

“Ah, uh,” Nico wasn’t sure what to say. Nothing was wrong technically, but Nico’s head kept telling him everything was wrong. Will picked up the hint from Nico’s expression and told one of the other campers to take charge.

“Let’s go somewhere a little quieter.” Will pulled Nico toward the Apollo cabin which looked like it had been attacked by elves. Nico assumed it was mostly Will’s doing. The inside wasn't much better. Somehow, Will had gotten a tree inside and it was decorated and waiting for presents to be out under it. Each bed for the campers that were year rounders had a stocking and some tinsel. A few of the other Apollo kids had fairy lights around their head board. There were a total of 5 year round Apollo kids.

Will sat on his bed and Nico sat next to him. Will waited patiently for Nico to find his words but the ghost king couldn't. He chose to, instead, keep hold of Will’s warm hand and to push the boy over and lay on him. Will chuckled and pat Nico’s hair. The boy cuddled into his chest, trying to keep the boy as close to him as he could.

“This isn’t about my check up, is it?” Will asked. Nico wanted to curse all of the Apollo kids for being so astute today. Nico nodded into Will’s chest. Will rubbed Nico’s back, pulling the boy into him a little.

“I knew you would be worried. You’ve reached that low before. A little weird to have someone like me have such a harrowing past.”

Nico looked up at him and rolled his eyes. “It isn’t uncommon.” he chided. “I just didn't expect you. Of all people, you literally glow with happiness.”

Will chuckled and kissed his boyfriend's nose. “I used to use that to my advantage. It was a lot easier to be upset when people didn't worry about you.” Nico’s brows knit together with worry. “You don’t have to worry now though. I'm a lot better.” Will kissed Nico’s lips this time, softly. “It was a lot harder when I was younger. I didn't have family. I spent a few winters alone. All of the other Apollo kids went to school and spent Christmas with their families. I was here. I ever knew my mother because she died in childbirth.” Will rubbed Nico’s back in circular motions; more as a comfort to himself than to the son of Hades.

Nico knew how he felt. His heart ached and he wished he could take away that feeling from Will. This literal ray of sunshine meant so much to Nico. Will cared for Nico like no one else had. He smiled and laughed and moved with such confidence it was contagious. Will was everything Nico loved and aspired to have and yet here he was telling him that he suffered similarly to Nico. 

“I spent 2 Christmases here by myself. The first one was when it started. It wasn't as bad as the next year. The third year was when two more year rounders arrived and everyone realized how bad I had gotten. They knew I had at least thought about self harm, but no one asked for scars like I do. No one realized how easy it is to hide.” 

Nico wasn’t sure when he had started crying, but Will lifted his head and wiped a tear from his eye. There were small tear stains on Will’s shirt. Will smiled at the boy and sat up. He pulled up his sleeve and showed Nico the pale scars.

“3 years ago around this time of year, one of my brothers brought a Christmas tree into our cabin and we all decorated it together. We invited over a few of the other cabins. We made each other gifts and it was the best Christmas I had ever had. It made me realize that I do have family even if we aren’t directly related. I stopped harming myself and no one ever said anything to me except at my examinations. It's kind of the Apollo cabin secret that no one really talks about.” Will smiled at Nico who pulled him into a hug and wiped the tears that fell down Will’s face.

Even Will had never really talked about it since three years ago and letting all of his secrets out to Nico now made his emotions go haywire. He wasn't sad but he wasn't happy either and yet Will still had this beautiful melancholic glow and he and his boyfriend wiped their tears. Will kissed Nico softly and gave him a softer and warmer smile than his usual one.

“I guess that explains why you are so gung ho on Christmas,” Nico chuckled. 

“Yeah, I promised to make every camper never feel alone on Christmas,” Will brightened up, his usual cheer coming back to him. Nico pushed him back onto the bed and cuddled into him. The afternoon had been emotionally draining and the son of Apollo could use a break from his duties as the happiest camper. Will didn't protest and cuddled Nico right back. He let out a long sigh and kissed the top of Nico’s head. The two lay like that for the rest of the afternoon, feeling closer than ever and enjoying their new understanding of each other


End file.
